On Holidays

Cael: "Tomorrow won't be Christmas anymore."
Mom: "Right."
Cael: "So what's next?"
Mom: "New Years."
Cael: "So that's St. Patrick's Day?"
Mom: "No, it's New Years."
Cael: "Is that when we eat dumplings?"
Mom: "Um, sure."
Cael: "Yum!"

Accounting

Dad: "I hear you've been really good at school."

Cael: "Yeah. I've been in trouble only a few times. Like maybe two or three. And then there's one more, and that makes four and that's it."

More career choices

Mom: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

Cael: "Let me think... ... ... I know, a farmer!"

Mom: "What are you going to grow on your farm?"

Cael: "You mean like animals?"

Mom: "Sure, animals or vegetables. What do you think?"

Cael: "Baby tigers. ... Baby piggies."

Mom: "Oh, careful! The baby tigers may want to eat the baby piggies."

Cael: "Not on my farm."

Mom: "Okay, what else?"

Cael: "Mice in a cage. Baby kitties. And baby puppies."

Mom: "That's wonderful! Where is your farm going to be? Iowa? Nebraska? Missouri?"

Cael: "Hmm... ... ... I know! NORTH AMERICA!"

Speechless

"You knocked the words right out of my mouth!"

Fickle birds

Mom: "You'll have to help us watch for hummingbirds again this morning."

Cael: "They're not coming back for a long time."

Mom: "Why not?"

Cael: "'Cause they're off sucking on somebody else's flowers."

Mother Earth

"I talk to her quietly in my room and she answers back with a star. It's a gift to me."

Ice cream cones inspire neologisms

"This is blaster. You know what 'blaster' means? It means, 'This is delicious, it's the goodest day ever, and it won't give me nightmares.'"

"This is very, very blaster."

They don't care for seafood, apparently

Cael: "I'd like to introduce you to my soup."

A: <pretend-tastes the imaginary soup>

Cael: "Does it taste too fishy to you?"

A: "No."

Cael: "It does to me, because I'm a faerie."

Easter Decorations

"Tell whoever it is that's on the phone that I made two 'super eggs' and one them's name is Aidan and the other is George Washington."

The New Imaginary Friend

"Her name is Jenny. She's a gymnastic. She eats raw potatoes. Really."

On age

"My sister's twelve. And when I grow up, I'm going to be five."

Tomayto, Tomahto

Cael: "Ouch. Right in the tentacles."

Mom: "Honey, you don't have any tentacles."

Cael: "Yes, I do. This girl's got nuts!"

No more talking

After tucking her *back* into bed...

Mom: "Good night. It time to go to sleep. No more talking."

Cael: "Okay..."

"...Good night..."

"...See you in the morning."

Mom: "Cael, that's 'talking.'"

Cael: "Okay. But I love you."

Mom: "I love you, too. No more talking."

Cael: "Okay. See you in the morning."

Mom: "Cael."

Cael: "Okay. But I love you."

Mom: "Stop talking." (walks downstairs)

Cael: "Okay..."

"...Okay!"

"...OKAY!!!"

Mom (sternly): "O. KAY."

Cael: "Sorry...

"...See you in the morning."

Mom: "Argh."

Elbow Terminology

"It's not a 'funny bone.' They should call it a 'hurty bone.'"

Hades

"My piggy is going to go visit the underworld. Not the real one; the pretend one. The pretend one has bugs and lots of dirt. The real one is the same as the pretend one."

Bushido

"Karate is when you jump off something or knock something down. And you have to yell 'Yaaaah!' when you jump off something. That's how you learn karate, and I teached you now."

After which she leaps from the couch with a shout, lands somewhat on her head and exclaims, "All part of the plan!"

Followed shortly thereafter by, "Well, more or less."

Quasi-neologisms

"I'm an orthodontist; a kind of a dog pet species."

Jurassic pals

"Um, guys, did you know that friends are special? They are. I heard that on Barney."

Molly's a comedian

"Why do chickens sit on their eggs?

'Cause they don't have chairs!

Molly told me that one. She's my 'maginary friend."

How to make toast

"You put some soft bread on a stove for too long 'til it turns hard, and that's toast!"

It ain't over 'til...

Mom: "Is your movie almost over?"

Cael: "No. It's just that there are eleventeen more minutes left. That's all."

Space Agent Cael

On a cleaning mission in outer space:

"I plugged my breath 'cause there's no air."

Shortly thereafter:

"There's no air in space, so don't go there."

More Career Choices

"I want to be a ballerina when I grow up. Also a paleontologist. And a library person."

Economies of scale

After Cael recited a litany of treats she wanted to bring to school for her birthday:

Mom: "They usually only want you to bring one treat."

Cael: "Okay, for my one treat can I bring two things?"

Arcade Games

"Do you know how to play 'Whack-a-Mole?' You have to hit these beaver guys. Your hands can be the beavers and I'll whack 'em."

Tail Tales

"I'm going to tell you a story.

There was this guy on TV. He had five kitties. Their names were Glockenspiel, Fahrvergnügen, Mahrmergnügen, Eyelash, and Home Depot."

The Princess Bride

Cael: "Where are they?"

Dad: "They're at the top of the Cliffs of Insanity."

Cael: "Who's Sandy?"

Prestidigitation

"Dad, I'm going to show you something even *more* magic.

You won't even see it.

Close your eyes."

On facial hair

"You still have the itchy-scratchies. You might want to shave."